What's a G-Spot? and How To Find It!
Did Someone Say G-Spot?
To some people the G-Spot may seem kind of like a unicorn - often referenced in pop culture, but still generally regarded as a fantasy. And that doesn’t really come as a surprise, seeing as the G-spot wasn’t even a widely recognized term until the 1980's! Researchers are still at odds with their findings and hold a variety of views about the ever elusive G-spot. So, it’s probably best to break it down in layman’s terms.
The G-Spot Basics
What does G-spot even mean? Well, it’s not really a glamorous story, but it’s called the G-spot because of Ernst Gräfenberg, who was the first gynecologist to report on the erogenous zone. We now know that it’s definitely less of a “spot” and more of a “region” that’s typically 2-3 inches up the front wall of the vagina. Stimulating this area is generally believed to enhance pleasure, stimulate orgasms, and in some cases, release female ejaculation (or as pop culture calls it, "squirting"). There are a lot more technicalities and specifics about the biology behind why the G-spot feels so good, but maybe it’s most useful to say that the anatomy of each person with a vagina is going to be different and no one is going to experience pleasure in the exact same way.
Location, Location, Location
You’re probably wondering how to find this ambiguous area - and that’s a valid thought! It’s most likely going to be easiest to make this a solo journey of discovery if you’re not familiar with where to find the G-spot. If you’ve heard that inserting your fingers and moving them in a “come hither motion” is a good way to find it - that’s not entirely wrong. The G-spot is on the front inside wall of the vagina (think behind and below your belly button) and is easy to access with your fingers. It can also be accessed with sex toys such as insertable vibrators or dildos. When you’re feeling around on your quest, it’s not like you’ll find a spot that you press that delivers an instant orgasm. So don't anticipate that! But you will learn what the sensation of stimulating the area feels like and discover what’s most pleasurable for you.
Better Together
So you've found your G-spot on your own - amazing! Now, how do you guide your partner to your G-Spot? If you’ve done your own self discovery, then you should know what feels good for you and can help your partner by having them follow your lead and communicating where it feels good.
In any sexual experience it’s so important to keep communication open so that each of you knows when things feel amazing, uncomfortable, and any sensation in between. By physically and verbally helping them to find your G-spot during foreplay they’ll be able to more easily find and stimulate it if you have penetrative sex. Remember - every body is different. So the location and size of your G-spot may be different than other vagina owners. It's about what feels good for YOUR body and making your partner aware of that.
Now What?
You've located your G-spot! You guided your partner to it. You know it feels good, but now how do you stimulate it? Most female orgasms are achieved through clitoral stimulation, and since the G-spot is really an internal extension of the clitoris this is great news! Even though the G-spot is internal, stimulating it starts on the outside. If a straight to the point approach is your thing, direct stimulation to the clitoral head and shaft will get things warmed up pretty quickly. But if you’re looking for a gradual approach to pleasure, try massaging your inner thighs, pubic mound, and labia to work your way into the vagina and eventually the G-spot.
Once inside, you can experiment with what actions feel good for you. Try stroking, tapping, alternating the number of fingers used, using toys, or bringing a partner to join in. Not everyone is going to reach an orgasm through G-spot stimulation alone and some people may not find it particularly comfortable. As mentioned before, some may even ejaculate or "squirt." This happens to some people because the glands between the bladder, urethra, and vagina are stimulated during penetration. Every body is going to have different reactions, and experimentation with stimulation is how you’ll find what feels best for you.
G-Spot vs. P-Spot
So vagina-owners were blessed with this magical location! Is there a version of the G-Spot for penis-owners? Yes, actually - there is! It’s often called the P-spot because it’s in the prostate - a gland in the male reproductive system that’s primary purpose is to create seminal fluid. It can help penis-having-people experience foreplay and orgasms in a new way. Unlike the G-spot, the P-spot can be stimulated internally or externally.
For internal stimulation, you’re going to enter the anus - with your hand or a toy and a whole lot of lube - about 2 inches inside the rectum. Once inside, use that same curved finger, come hither motion to locate and stroke the prostate. If anal penetration is not a comfortable option for you, no worries! External stimulation is definitely pleasurable and can be done via the perineum, also known as the taint, which is the area between the scrotum and the anus. Use your fingertips to stroke, press, or rub the area and find what motions and sensations feel best for you (or your partner). As always, communication is the key to making these interactions comfortable and pleasurable for all parties involved.
It Takes Two to Tango
Let’s talk about some sex positions for G-spot stimulation! Since you know where the G-spot is and how good it can feel, it makes sense to want to make it part of your regular sexual encounters. Knowing where it is, you probably already know that some positions are going to stimulate this zone more effectively. Doggy style is probably the first position you think of, which is exactly right.
Because penetration in this position happens from behind, it makes it easy to control the angle for reaching the G-spot and enables deeper penetration. Cowgirl is another great position for penetrative sex and the G-spot because you can control your positioning on top of your partner. That way you get to feel the best angle, movement patterns, and pressure to make your G-spot the star of the show.
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If your partner doesn’t have a penis - fear not! A combination of oral and manual stimulation is a great option and you can also add in toys that are specifically designed to curve and reach the G-spot more easily. Bonus points here because you can give and receive in this scenario!
The More You Know
Now that you’ve conquered the basics, it’s time to find what works best for you. It’s always good to remember that setting goals for sex can distract you from finding pleasure in the act. So, don’t put pressure on yourself to achieve an orgasm from G-spot stimulation. Think of it as icing on an already decadent, delicious cake that you can enjoy by yourself or with a partner. The icing is tasty by itself, but it’s not really as delectable without the cake accompanying it. At the end of the day, you want to reach a satisfying relationship with your sexuality and your body. Every body deserves to enjoy sex!
