What Are the Love Languages? And How to Find Out Yours!

There are many different ways to say "I love you." "Are you hungry?" "Is there anything I can do to help you?" Squeezing someone's hand. "I appreciate what you do for me." "Can we spend this weekend together?"

Everyone expresses love differently, and everyone feels the most loved by different expressions of it. People speak different languages, and if you're in tune with what language they speak, you are able to communicate better with them.

Miscommunication damages relationships. So, it's really important to know what you and your partner's love languages are.

What are the different love languages?

There are five different love languages: words of affirmation, physical touch, acts of service, quality time, and gift-giving.

By identifying your own love languages, you can communicate to your partner(s) what you need to feel loved, and you'll know what they need to feel loved. Communication is lubrication!

Words of Affirmation

Everyone wants to hear sweet and inspiring words that make them feel loved and cared for.

If you enjoy kind words, encouragements, love notes, appraisals, compliments, and appreciations, this could be your love language!

Words can provide support, empathy, and/or validation. People whose love language is words of affirmation feel fulfilled when you express your appreciation for them through your words.

Physical Touch

Some people feel loved by physical touch. This doesn’t have to just be sexual. It can include physical signs of affection such as cuddling, holding hands, kissing, hugging, rubbing your hand on someone's back, etc..

It doesn't matter what it is, so long as it's skin-to-skin contact. People who's primary love language is physical touch just want to know that they are in safe hands.

Acts of Service

Sometimes the little things do make all the difference. If you are the type of person who believes in chivalry, your love language may be acts of service!

Some examples of acts of service are making them coffee in the morning, doing your partner's laundry, making a playlist for them, cooking them dinner, or giving them a neck massage.

Note: if your partner's love language is acts of service, it is important to acknowledge and appreciate what they do for you.

Quality Time

Spending quality time doing some of your favorite things with the person you love is so fulfilling. Getting that undivided attention, knowing that minute, hour, day is yours and no one else’s with no distractions can make you feel oh so special.

Quality time could be your love language if you love planning and spending undivided time with the one you love. Some ideas for quality time are baking together, getting an AirBnB for a weekend, doing a puzzle together, or spending a day in bed.

Gift-giving

And the final love language... gift-giving - and it's just what it sounds like. People who's main love language is gift-giving feel the most loved and appreciated by receiving gifts and show their love and appreciation by giving thoughtful gifts.

The gifts don't need to be expensive. They should be thoughtful. Thoughtful gifts can go a long way in building relationships. 

How to figure out your love language

If you didn't identify your main love language from reading through each of them, you can try asking yourself some questions. Do you like spending a lot of time alone with your special someone? Do you enjoy reading or writing love notes for your partner? Are you a big cuddler or hugger?

Interestingly, you can have more than one love language – you can love all of them. Nevertheless, you should really pay attention to the one or two that encompasses you the most. Identify your and your partners' love languages!

The important step then is communicating them and having conversations about how you feel most loved and how your partner feels most loved. Then you can meet each other's needs.